I hafta admit, it is very surreal to be talking about getting older.  Cuz we never really feel like we are … right?  I mean, we think about it.  It’s obvious I do.  I think, “OMG I am like half way to 88.”  But deep down, we still feel young … we NEED to feel young.  How many times do you see somebody you knew when they were a li’l bitty thing, and you think, “Well, gosh, I didn’t realize THEY were getting older too … that can only mean one thing … I’m getting REALLY old!”


There are so many folks I looked up to when I was just a youngin’.  And then I got older and was like, “Really?  I used to think you were awesome … I used to aspire to BE like you?  And look at you now!”  We are so naïve when we are young.  I think that was the biggest disappointment in my life … that people were actually HUMAN and not on a perfect pedestal like I’d put so many.  But now that is my saving grace, cuz I sure as hell ain’t perfect.


This is the absolute best part … I may have been disappointed, but then when I fell from grace, I realized … well that’s just life!  Ain’t nobody perfect.  Ain’t nobody to be worshipped … only people to learn from.


Like my dad … ya, that shirt … I can’t explain it.  But he sure looks proud wearing it!  I remember his last Christmas, in a physical rehab center … he’d had lung-reduction surgery.  I had picked out a flannel shirt for him from LL Bean.  He knew damn well he was never gonna wear it and just pointed at me, saying, “This is yours.”  I still have it, and I wear it proudly.  I just know he was the most wonderful man … to me … he called me his best friend.  That doesn’t mean he was wonderful to his other children or his wife.  That said, I know he was not perfect.  I just loved him a whole bunch.  I miss him.  Death is incredibly final.  What an eye opener.


I feel the need to get all this out cuz I don’t think that Jeffrey (my brother) nor Jimmy and Lisa (my half brother and sister) really understand.  Sometimes I think I am the laughingstock of the family, but I am ok widdat … thumbody has to be!  Hell, I’m willing to put a pic up there of me at over 150 lbs lol.  My mom told me I was not planned nor wanted.  And I was way too fat to fit into her side of the family.  Well, sorry, but no matter what age you are, that is hard to hear, cuz by that point I knew sure as frick I didn’t WANT to be here.

Hey look.  I know I am a good person.  That’s all that matters.  At some point, I want to share my Dad’s words of wisdom, but there are many letters to go through.  Someday I will.



I admit, I used my birfday weekend as an excuse to eat whatever the flip I wanted.  I’ve had two frozen pizzas (and another on the burner for tonight).  Had some french fries.  Had a pint of Ben & Jerry’s.  This morning, I told my friend if she wanted me to powa wash … I’d need some energy.  So we went to:


Where I ordered a cajun chicken filet biscuit:


It was amazingly delicious.  You know how you can go to a fast-food place and sometimes it’s not so great but sometimes it’s freakn’ delicous?  Today, the fast-food God was looking over me.  But really, anything with the word cajun is guar-UN-teed to taste yummy.  But I went the extra carbohydrate-laden mile and said … gimme the combo … and hurry up!  With the combo I got Bo-rounds:


The tastiest tater treat I’ve ever had from anywhere, doused in ketchup of course.  Well, what the shiznit, there are four in the pic … I only got three.  Whatever.

Oh, and the first pic was from my fave Mexican place.  We Ix-Nayed the Izza-Pay and hit Monte Albans.  Yum.  So what if I’d once arrested our waiter … he wouldn’t mess with our food, would he?!  Hehe.

‘Nuff of da foodstuff (but thank you Bi-Lo for having Homerun Inn Pizza on sale.  It’s in the oven now).  Tomorrow, I am back to low carb.  Today, I powa washed with a friend:


Ya might hafta click a pics to see the difference.  We worked hard.


She didn’t know which end of the brush was up (kidding), but she’s smiling and that’s all that really matters, right?  We finally got our “mojo” on and knocked this project out.  We even had an audience:


Midnight and L’il Bit.  Midnight was very photogenic but refused to allow me to pressure wash him (‘fraidy cat).  L’il Bit, on the other hand, seemed to enjoy a light spray but did not want me to take a pic of her.  Just look at her face (on the right).  I had to zoom in cuz she is hiding under the 5th wheel.  They miss their daddy and were very sweet.


It was hot and my new buddy brought water … how thoughtful.  She left it out in the sun, when we had access to a dang fridge.  Mmmmm … nothing quite as refreshing as a hot bottle of agua.  I asked her about the warm wetness, and she said, “Well I asked you if you had a cooler!”  ”Well, yes, I do, and I told you I did, but I didn’t have it with me, and you have a gosh darn REFRIGERATOR!”  Funny stuff.


She did get the hang of the brush, and we finally fell into a decent routine after we were like 75% done.  She kept saying, “Oh, next year, we’ll knock this out quickly.”  Ya, next year it will be done in minutes rather than hours.  Where did I sign up for next year?  I never know where I’m gonna be next DAY, let alone next year!

Oh, and she was really considerate … she let me climb up the unsteady ladder and get up on the roof to clean the high spots.  Bless her heart.  Seriously, though, I had a ton o’ fun.  Good friends are few and far between, and it’s been a long time that I have experienced this.

Then she thought it would be clever to “fall” off the ladder just when we were about to finish.  I wasn’t lettin’ her off the hook … she owed me lunch, which was the 1st pic, a full order of ground beef and cheese nachos with extra cheese.  I’m still full.  Then I took her to the hospital.

Smile with tongue out

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Birthday cupcake

Ok so I made a post last night but I’ve since taken it down.  A friend stopped by while I was organizing and writing the post, and I had a li’l too much b-day cheer with her, so the post didn’t quite get finished the way I had intended, LOL!  I actually sorta posted it by accident … ugh!

I will fix it later today … gotta go help said friend pressure wash her manfriend’s RV.  No worries, she will pay me back with a b-day pizza and maybe even some ice cream.

That said, y’all have a mahvelous Monday.  See ya in the garage later!


Smile with tongue out

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It made me a year older!  I had an awesome day, and I thank everyone for the sweet b-day wishes.


So I am listening to AC/DC’s Hell’s Bells.  And here I am at around age 1.  Song seems appropriate.  I was told my dad tried hard to make me photogenic.  He fixed my hair, and I immediately unfixed it.  I think I look happy; he said I was miserable and crying.  And is that a dangnabbin’ dress?  Ya … I mean … NO way!  I guess my parents hadn’t taken me shoppin’ for Levi’s or ToughSkins.


Yowza, another dress.  Age 1.5 I reckon.  How long’s it gonna take before my father realizes I am a dang TOMBOY!  I wonder why my thumb was up like that … I look like the Fonz.  Ya think if I snapped my fingers, a couple of cute li’l boy toys would come running!


So here it is.  The writing on the back of this pic says I was 6 days old.  I gotta be honest, this is still my favorite sleeping position.  Dunno that I dig my left hand into the mattress but whatever.  I reckon my wrist got pretty numb and fingers wicked tingly.

Here’s one of my all-time faves … I wish I still had this hairdryer:


I beg of you to pardon the nudity … at that point I didn’t have much to hold that towel up with … not that I do now actually … ugh.


I really loved these corduroys, wish this was a full-length image.  Do they even make corduroys anymore?!  Levi’s and ToughSkins sure did in my younger years.

Nursery school, where I went at age 4.  Does nursery school still exist, or is it now called preschool?  I loved that place.  It was a tiny li’l building, with a dirt trail off the back of it that we’d walk and enjoy nature.  I dunno why I remember that … I seem to remember the teacher showing us mint leaves and encouraging us to taste them.  Sometimes I’m not sure if my memories are real or just dreams I had!  I remember having the chicken pox during nursery school AND riding a bus to nursery school.  Hmmm … I just dunno.


What, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, am I wearing here?!  Mimi called it a “yoga” suit.  It’s one piece and on the bottom only covers what a pair of Underoos would (do they make those anymore, if not Google ‘em cuz they were FUNtastic).  I’m just-a hopin’ Momma put me in some pants as well that day.  This is my nursery school pic.  I can’t seem to find a kindergarten one.


This is me when I was a li’l fat during 2nd and 3rd grades — not sure which year this was, as I wore the same dress both years.  That dress was awful, with elastic bands squeezing me all around and leaving imprint marks all over me.  But I was pleasing my parents, right?  It wouldn’t surprise me if I made Mimi pack me some comfortable clothing to change into soon as the pic was taken.  And Matt Arold, my first kiss, which happened in the 2nd grade, thought I was hot … I mean he DID kiss me.


Now here’s that tomboy I’ve been telling you about.  That t-shirt had a iron-on (remember those, from the mall?); it was of Starsky and Hutch (remember them?).  No not the new ones.  I’m talkin’ ‘bout Paul Michael Glaser and David Soul.  I was in love with David Soul.  After watching this video, I can’t really figure out why … but it’s a good song.

The show and the Red Gran Torino with that white stripe … what a sweet ride!


I reckon I’d better fast forward to how I dress nowadays and spare y’all out there who are thinking, “OH MY GAWD, gag me with a large ladle … is this thang in love with herself or what?!”  Perhaps just a little, and I’m really diggin’ going through old photographs:


Circa 1995, I think?!  My friend on the left, Joni, had graduated college and her parents took us to Disney World to celebrate.  Good times.  This was at Epcot, the bar in Great Britian.

And, last but not least:


Circa today baby!  Still sportin’ da Levi’s, although they really don’t make ‘em like they did way back when … the damn things fall apart just pullin’ ‘em up.  Perhaps I shouldn’t pull them up by the belt loops, but jeez.

FORTY-FOUR, WOO WEE!!!  Time goes be so amazingly quickly that it’s almost scary.  I remember very well the day I turned 30, which was 14 years ago.  In that same short period of time, I will be close to 60!  So bizarre.  Treasure the good times and hang tough through the bad.

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Since I’ve posted in the Addiction and Depression section … I’ve even considered deleting it and adding a “love” section or something a little more cheery.  But here’s the real deal:


After all, I’m big into that power of positive thinking stuff, right?!


Truth is, I really was believing in the power of positive thinking.  Heck, I wanted, no needed, to believe in it.  It gave me hope.  I thought the tides had turned in my life, and I was gonna live my dream.  I started this blog and even hoped to help folks suffering from depression.  Instead, one of my friends, who used to read my posts, committed suicide … blew her dang brains out (brave girl).  Yikes … that was hard.  What was even harder was the ignorance shown to me by some of my former coworkers at the funeral home, but I was there to worship her memory, not play office politics.


No, I’m not looking for sympathy.  Writing just helps.  Like the first image says, I’m both happy and sad.  Unfortunately, the sadness usually wins out … that bastard!  Hehe.


Isn’t she so pretty?  WARNING!  Language … if the “F” word offends you, stop reading now.  I need to get this out.  That is my mom.  I always knew she would eventually kill herself.  I don’t think I could have prevented it.  That said, I left her when she needed me most.  Here’s what happened:

I got a phone call that Mimi (my mom) was found in a catatonic state.  She was supposed to be a hostess at some event and didn’t show up, so one of her friends went to check on her.  This person found her sitting in a chair in the living room just staring straight ahead.  I reckon the lady called for an ambulance … I dunno.

I just know she ended up at a local hospital, where multiple medical tests were run.  It was determined that whatever was wrong was psychological and not physical.  So she was transferred to a psychiatric hospital.  If I recall correctly, late hubby and I drove up to NH right away with our dog, Crystal.  We brought my ‘puter so I could still work, as I was doing medical transcription at the time.


Ain’t she precious?!  Fast forward to our first visit with Mom. It was bizarre. She thought she’d been in a car accident and that her house had burned down and all kindsa crazy stuff. Nothing she said made sense, and my brother had to spoon feed her.  After a few days of being medicated, she seemed quite “normal” again. After just a week in the psychiatric ward, the doc let her go home and prescribed her a shit-ton of psychiatric medications.

OK fine.  I take her to the pharmacy to fill the prescriptions, and it turns out they are gonna cost her hundreds of dollars a month.  Naturally, she freaked out and worried about how she would pay for them.  I, being the selfish person that I am, just wanted to come back to NC.  Doing the transcription from her kitchen table rather than my $800 ergonomic chair was wreaking havoc on my body, wah wah wah.  So after she was home a day or two, we left.  I will never forget her watching us leave out her bedroom window.  I knew something wasn’t right, but I left anyway.


I’m sorry, Mama … I never meant to hurt you … I never meant to make you cry.  I messed up.

We drove part way back to NC and stayed in a hotel that night, in Maryland I think.  Soon as we got settled, I called my mom to check in.  She was upset with me cuz I had cable TV hooked up at her house, so we argued.  Heck, I was married to a man … men like their TV.  Not to mention there wasn’t much else for Don to do while I worked!  I told her I would pay the monthly bill.  Didn’t matter.  She hung up pissed at me.  That was the last time we spoke.  Awesome memory, huh?!


The next day, we were almost home, (we were renting the house above and LOVED it) like 45 minutes away, when Crystal decided it would be a wonderful idea to shit all over the backseat of my Toyota Tercel.  We stopped at the Waynesville rest area, where after cleaning up the mess, I tried to call my mom.  No answer.  I knew right then something was wrong.  I can’t drive by that rest area anymore without unpleasant memories.

We got home around 6ish in the evening.  I tried again to call my mom … and again no answer.  I called my brother and asked him to check on her.  I didn’t hear anything back from him, so I called her house again.  A female voice on the other end said, “Hampstead Police Department.”  OMG.  The female officer told me I need to call my brother.  I did and he said, “She did it.”  I felt awful that he had to find her like that.  Frickin’ surreal.

So I guess at that point, shock settled in.  I dunno.  I called some airline and secured an airplane ticket for me and da mutt to leave the next morning.  Don and I loaded up the Jeep Cherokee with my ‘puter so I could work up in NH.  I found some semblance of peace by going outside in the middle of the night and filling up the bird feeders, knowing full well they’d be long empty by the time we got back.

The next morning, I flew up to NH with my li’l dog Crystal, which was a freakin’ nightmare.  She took a dump in the middle of the Charlotte airport, and some guy yelled at me cuz he thought I was walking away when I was going to the bathroom to get some paper towels to clean it up.  He just kept yelling at me.  I wanted to say, “MOTHERFUCKER my mother committed suicide, give me a fucking break!”  But I couldn’t even get that out.  I simply said I was going to the bathroom for paper towels.

Then when we got to the airport in Manchester, NH, I let Crystal out of her carry-on bag as soon as we got outside.  Some really handsome airport security dude got on my ass saying she is not allowed outta the bag til we get to the parking lot.  He became ugly to me very quickly.  I really wasn’t trying to break the rules, but my curly-haired K-9 had “shat” all over the inside of the dang bag.  Late hubby arrived a day later with my computer and whatnot so I could still work.

I’m pretty sure it was the same day I got up there that we had a meeting at the funeral home.  The funeral dude gave us the death certificate and then left the room for some reason.  I read the certificate.  All I knew was that she had OD’d on all those expensive psychiatric meds, three bottles of them, but the death cert said she died of asphyxiation.  I looked at my brother and said, “So OD’ing causes asphyxiation?”  He said, “No, I didn’t want to tell you, but she also put a plastic bag over her head.”  Nice.  Well, she got what she truly wanted.  No cry for attention here.

Going through her house was hard.  She had pictures of my brother’s boys propped up on the kitchen table.  She also had apparently left a note, but I never got to see it.  From what I was told, all it said was, “I’m sorry.”  She was found in her bed.  On the nightstand next to her was a crumpled up tissue.  That made me sad, thinking she was crying into it before she passed.  It really sucked.

I know this post is a huge bummer as well, but I needed to get it out.  I don’t really care what anybody thinks about me for posting this.  Hell, I don’t have many followers anyway.  I think a total of 5 of my “Facebook Friends” have signed my petition.  How funny is that?!

If you or anyone you know is thinking of suicide, please check out this website:  Suicide … read this first. It has saved me numerous times … well worth the read.

So now y’all know the truth.  I have a dark side.  Muh ha ha ha!  I still think life is good … just not MY life all the time, lol!

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Jul 282012


It’s always been a practice of mine to pretend I can’t stand kids … I dunno why.  I guess for me it helps to justify why I never had any.  But truthfully, I think kids are totally cool.  This is Kiara, age 4, and Jeremiah, age 8.  Kiara’s mom was quite impressed because I asked Kiara to spell her name for me and she did so.  Mom said that was the first time she’d heard her do that.  I was honored to be a part of it.


It was these two and their parents who came to see da BeastHouse today.  As soon as they came in, I grabbed hold of these youngins and locked them in this curio.  That may seem drastic, but I need to sell my house … by any means.  And if this works, I will have a place to live rent free … jail!  Look at them begging to be let out.  Poor kids.  Too bad.  They will remain there until Mom makes an offer on da house.  I sit here now eating pizza watching them plead for just a small piece of crust.  The phone hasn’t rung yet!


Well, no, not really.  I didn’t get good vibes from the showing, but thems the breaks.  They had looked at a few other houses before checking mine out.  I got the impression they had already decided on one of those, but I could be wrong … it’s happened before.  Nice people though, and obviously I dug the kids.  They loved playing with Sammie.  I told them Sammie is a girl, her name short for Samantha, but they kept calling her Samuel.  It made me giggle.


Just for the heck of it, I started looking for rentals … you know … just in case I got an offer on da house.  I found the coolest little house, 600’ square feet.  It reminded me of the tiny apartment I had on Hampton Beach in NH, like I had come full circle.  Kinda early in my life to come full circle, but it is what it is.  Maybe the Mayans are right about the world ending in December.

I need to recant something I put in my blog post yesterday.  Here’s the quote:   “I believe I treat the man I love incredibly well; I think he takes it for granted.”  Beware of the next pic … LANGUAGE!

Image collected on -The Rjukan project-

Cute kitty, hehe.  Anyway, the truth is he made it clear to me that we had no future from the start.  So any feelings or whatever that transpired after that was of my own doing.  And maybe I didn’t treat him so well; I dunno.  I thought I did.  I take full responsibility for the end result, and I hope he forgives me.

‘Nuff of that shit.  I hate being sad, so I hope this goes away quickly!


Well, there it is … now I am smiling.  Does Jeremiah not remind you of Dennis the Menace?!  Or are you too young to remember him?  Howzabout Kiara, with her “Mommy’s Angel” t-shirt on, lol.  I asked Mommy if Kiara was truly Mommy’s angel or was she Mommy’s … well you know.  I won’t repeat her answer.  Bless her heart!

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My goal once was to always be positive with my posts, but realistically that is difficult to do.  A day or two ago, I got a really neat message from a woman I’ve never met.  It was a comment she added to my post about pulling out of a 3-day funk.  She said, “Thanks for sharing. Don’t be afraid to share the difficult times too. We all have to go through them and it’s what makes the great times oh so sweet!”  She is so right.  In a sense, it would be a lie to promote the power of positive thinking and only write posts on the GOOD times.  There is a lot to be said for thinking positively, but it is not foolproof.  Life happens.  I think the saying above is the best advice.  We all have problems, but we also all have so many blessings.


There are a lot of things I could sit here and whine and moan about, and boy did I do a lot of that in my time.  There are times I feel terribly sorry for myself (I think we all do to an extent – or a lot of us anyway).  But really … I have my health (save for that bat-shit crazy or BSC diagnosis but that hasn’t been confirmed yet), I have food in the fridge, a roof over my head (even though I’m trying to sell it as quickly as possible), a sweet dog, and I just got a JOB!  Ok, not so much what I wanted to be doing, but it’s what I need to do.  I am ever so grateful that my old employer hired me back.  I refuse to name the company for fear that someone will call them and inform them that I am BSC, lol.  I’m looking at this job opportunity positively … they put me on one of their hardest accounts, but it pays more money.  I could think, “Man they are trying to run me off already,” but I choose to think, “They looked at my QA (quality assurance) scores from when I worked there before and thought, “Now this is a girl who can handle a tough account.”

The biggest and most important thing I have is my sense of humor.  An old cliché, but laughter truly is the best medicine.  I love laughing and I love making others laugh.  There is nothing better.  I think this is funny, albeit kinda silly:


But I’m weird like that.


I want to talk about self-worth.  This hotdawg picture just fits cuz an old friend called me tonight.  He knows my past affinity for hotdogs.  And he also knows about my difficulties with feeling worthy.  It was good to laugh with him about old times.


Anyway, I used to determine my self-worth on whether or not I had a man in my life … was I loved, was I making a lot of money, do people like me, do I look good, etc.  Oh, I can be a real bitch when somebody done somebody (me) wrong song, but I have a heart of gold for the very few people I love.  I am one of the most painfully honest and outspoken persons you will ever meet, which is why friends are few and far between for me.  People don’t seem to like that.   That’s ok though; I prefer real over fake any day.  Gone are the days of settling, though.  I’d rather be alone than be treated poorly or disrespected.


I may have my “issues,” but I deserve to be treated well.  We all do.  Life is too short.  Way too friggin’ short.  I believe I treat the man I love incredibly well; I think he takes it for granted.  I’m about to turn 44 … forty-friggn-four!  I can’t believe it.  My life is half or more over.  And what do I have to show for it?!  Not much … I just hope that things will continue to get better and better.  I cannot afford to believe otherwise.  I don’t need a man, but it would be pretty cool to find one that appreciated me despite all my faults.  For now, alone is mighty fine.

Gnite, y’all!


get a job

Who am I to argue with Uncle Sam?  Now I admit, I never wanted to work for anybody ever again in my life.  I had hoped that by now, I would have figured out a way to make money, whether it be through my writing or winning the lottery.  It’s funny though cuz I was married to a much older man, and everyone around here just assumed he had a lot of money, but I was the breadwinner.


I will also admit that I haven’t dedicated the time I should have thus far to learning everything I can about interweb stuff.  I think I’m a li’l scared.  It’s amazing when you don’t work how you can fill your time so easily yet get hardly anything done.  I think I got more done when I was working 12-hour shifts.  There are so many things I could be doing …  like posting guest posts on other blogs, networking with a bunch of bloggers, submitting my writing to companies looking for good writers, etc.  I mean let’s face it, I’ve been unemployed since November 22, 2011, like 8 months … yikes.  But I, like lotsa folks I reckon, am as this describes:


It isn’t like I haven’t done ANYTHING, though.  I got this site set up, thought I had my house sold, got rid of a ton o’ stuff, and even traveled for the glorious month of May in my beloved BeastMobile, the absolute hands-down, no-doubt-about-it, best month of my entire life … I loved just about every second of it.  I stressed a little over Sammie Sad Eyes when I’d hafta leave her in da BeastMobile to run into a grocery store to stock up.  Those were the worst times … not so bad really, right?  I mean look at her as we are driving over the Atlantic Intracoastal Waterway by Beaufort, SC:


Oh hey, I got my laptop back … they were able to recover all my pics … yippee!  Remember this one:


I titled it, “babygatorwantstoeatmybobberafterbeingluredinbyaNathan’shotdog,” all one word.  This was one of the highlights of my trip, even if it did freak me out a teeny weeny bit.  By the way, I never heard back from this same campground I took this pic in reference to working there … I should have called them … 15% crippling self-doubt won over.  Ugh!


So what does one do when one needs to earn a paycheck?  I dunno what y’all do, but I do the backstroke and rely on previous job skills.  Before taking on the challenge of law enforcement, I worked for 5 years from home as a medical transcriptionist.  The money was great, as were the benefits.  And working in my PJs?  Well what can beat that?!  Late hubby took a pic of me one day while working:


I did get a li’l bored with sitting at home and typing all day and I felt I needed more of a physical and mental challenge, so I went to the “academy” at age 40, otherwise known in the state of North Carolina as BLET (Basic Law Enforcement Training).  I loved it … 4 great months.  Being a cop was awesome.  But it also reminded me why I went to school for medical transcription in the first place … to work from home and avoid all the drama and nonsensical, hateful idiocy that goes on in the real world.  No office politics, no backstabbing, no “he said, she said.”  Full benefits and a bunch of happy, friendly, hard-working folks cheering each other on.

no brainer

I’m getting to the no brainer thing.  When I realized I now hafta get a job, I hemmed and hawed.  I thought, “Who would hire me around here?”  I got in touch with a li’l Italian restaurant I used to work for, but they aren’t hiring.  Their food is yummy and the job was fun … I did it as a side job when I used to work in transcription cuz I wanted to get outta the house a bit.  I also thought, “There ain’t nobody around here who would pay me what I made in law enforcement, let alone what I made working from home doing transcription!”  But I plugged along like my mother always prodded me to.  She’d say, “Keep smilin’.”  Pretty ironic really, when you consider the path she ended up taking.  But I’m still smiling, even though the hippie hair growth thing is way outta control; I hafta strap down my graying curly locks with a bandana:


So guess what?  I done did the backstroke and applied back at the transcription company I worked for and got a job offer today … yippee!  It was a no brainer.  The job has evolved into more of an editing position rather than straight typing due to voice recognition software, which I’m kind of excited about.  It will be a few weeks before I can start cuz their trainers are backlogged, but I feel very positive.  It’s an extremely solid company that treats their employees like gold, a very rare employer trait these days, so I feel like I’ve hit the jackpot.


The best thing about this job is I can do it from anywhere I have an internet connection.  So I can leave Macon County if and when the house sells … yay!  Da BeastHouse is being shown Saturday morning … I’m crossing my fingers and praying but trying not to get my hopes up too high.


Hehe, yea whatever!



For real, dudes and dudettes.  I know, I know … perhaps it’s not ALL that exciting to y’all, but it’s got me pretty pumped.  I got an e-mail from Barely Legal Radio yesterday saying they were going to speak to Li from MonsterFishKeepers, whom I mentioned in my last post, live on the air and said they should speak with me as well if I am available.  Well, yeah they should speak with me … I got this radio thing going!  Li, however, definitely has more to lose than I do with what Monster Energy is up to; I just didn’t want him stealing my thunder (kidding … sort of).  Here is his logo … doesn’t it just make you think of caffeine- and taurine-infused beverages?!


Monster’s beef is mainly with the M, which looks nothing like their satanic M (seriously, there’s something on the web about how their M looks like 666 in Hebrew … I dunno, but it’s funny anyway.  Please click on the link and sign da Fish Keeper’s petition:  Support MonsterFishKeepers.  There is strength in numbers, and Li is doing all he can to help me.  If you click here MonsterFishKeepers, you can also link to the petition but, more importantly, you will see that Li was gracious enough to include a link to my petition on the right sidebar (thanks Li – you rock).  I plan to do the same for him, as soon as I figure out how, hehe.


And while you’re at it, I shamelessly beg and plead (with sugar on top) of you to sign mine as well and ask everybody you know to sign MY PETITION.  It only takes a few seconds, but each and every signature is powerful.  Remember I said if you don’t sign it, your dryer will eat your socks?!  Well, if you DO sign it, you will find three missing socks in the next five months (just like the fortune above states).  As it stands right now, I have about 35 signatures.  That’s not a lot but it’s a start, and I have faith.  Just think, that’s 105 socks recovered over the next five months.  It might not even take five months – I signed it and I’ve found two already!


This, my peeps, is Attorney Joe Escalante, a mighty fine-lookin’ man if I do say so myself.  He is in a band called The Vandals (click the link to check out their website).  I got in touch with him through LegalZoom.  His radio show is on:


Outta Los Angeles or Burbank or somewhere near Hollywood.  Li and I were on the show last night, and Attorney Escalante hammered Monster Energy Company, whose representatives failed to return calls asking them to talk live on the show.  I think the show went very well, was tastefully done, and may even produce some positive results for us.  I was nervous, but I think I did ok.   I haven’t dared listen yet, but here is the sound file.  It starts around 39:40:  Taking on Monster Energy.

Y’all have a great day … I’ve got lots of work to do on the website (like learn how to fix that ugly link to my petition), and I’ve got to write/plan a youtube video … it’s gonna be a hoot!

Smile with tongue out



But I don’t know how to put a link to it on the front page of my blog yet, bwah ha ha!  So here it is:  Sign within 48 hours or socks will start disappearing from your dryer.  Ya, I know, that happens all the time anyway … but surely you can’t afford to lose many more?!  I know I can’t.  Seriously, though, I offer much gratitude for your support, and if you would please tell two friends, and ask them to tell two friends, and so on and so forth cuz I only have two friends, and I already told them!

The other day, I got a friend request on Facebook from a name I did not recognize.  You know how that goes, right?  I noticed he had like 3000+ “friends.”  Wow, I haven’t even hit 300 … I wondered how he found me.  So I decided to accept the friendship, and if he turned out to be a freakazoid, I would simply unfriend him.  Turns out, this guy’s got Monster Energy Company on his ass too.  Check this out:  Support monsterfishkeepers.com.  I found this pic on his FB page … funny:


This gentleman called me last night and filled me in on his plight and on others who’d been subjected to the same bullying as we are now being subjected to.  This dude’s into fish keeping!  I admit, I didn’t know what that meant (I reckon cuz I don’t keep fish ‘cept in the freezer), so I asked him what it is … well duh … it’s owning aquariums and stuff in your home and having fish for pets.  Pretty cool.  How in the world is his fish keeping forum a threat to the Monster Energy Company?  I suppose if someone was drunk and kept a can of Monster in the fridge right next to a fishbowl with the Monster Fish Keepers logo on it, they might grab the wrong one to mix another drink?!  Ya right … come on now!


So as not to just pick on Monster … look what this poor guy is going through:  Chick-Fil-A lawsuit.  I think it’s awesome this guy is fighting this nonsense.  Ok, so Chick-Fil-A’s logo is “Eat More Chicken.”  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD … what does eating more green, leafy stuff hafta do with chicken?  Do they really think peeps are gonna come into Chick-Fil-A expecting to find a Spicy Kale Sammich Deluxe or someone’s gonna confuse the “Eat more Kale” guy with eating chicken?!  They aren’t even in the same food group, people!  Ooh, lemme guess, Chick-Fil-A was in the process of inventing waffle kale fries!  For you kale lovers out there, check out his site:  Eat More Kale!  I, myself, still have an aversion to green stuff, but I’m working on that … took a bite of a pickle the other day, but I didn’t swallow — baby steps!


Here’s another company outta Vermont that Monster went after, who crafted a beer called “The Vermonster.”  Monster lost this battle:  Defeated.  Apparently, Monster Energy Company is considering a line of beer. Why? Alcohol is a depressant, certainly not something that gives much energy.  Even if so, The Vermonster came first, and Monster did not trademark for such.


So the radio show … I tend to read too much into things and assumed when I got an e-mail on Thursday morning that said I would be contacted Thursday or Friday about Sunday’s show, I assumed they meant THIS Sunday, like tomorrow.  But I got an e-mail this morning asking for my phone number.  They said they’d call Thursday or Friday.  I dunno which Thursday or Friday, but I have faith that they will call.  And I turned on my new fish-keeping buddy to Attorney Joe Escalante, so he sent the good lawyer an e-mail as well.  Begin da Boycott Monster Revolution … woo wee!


Look, I’m no legal expert nor business expert, but I did my research before applying for my trademark because it cost quite a bit of cheese to apply for it.  I used the assistance of LegalZoom, who sent me a detailed list of potential trademark “infringements” I might incur.  They instructed me to go through each and every one, which I did.  I found nothing that I felt my trademark would be a threat to.  Also, Monster Energy Company was not even on the list; however, I knew they used the slogan “Unleash THE Beast.”  I went to their website and nowhere did I even see that slogan on the homepage.  Not to mention, I’m selling positive thinking and maybe a few t-shirts later on … not hype-me-up beverages.  I see no threat at all of harming Monster.  I just don’t think they’ve got this locked up.

Check out what a friend forwarded to me.  It’s at a park called Canobie Lake near where I grew up:

Unleash the Beast.

I could go on and on, but the point I’m trying to make is folks have been saying unleash the beast for years.  Monsters are everywhere.  Companies have been using fancy-shaped M’s in their names since way before the energy drink was created.  Think M&M’s.  They gonna go after Ms. Brown too?!

Ms Brown_mm

They’ve really created a monster here, and I intend to fight for my trademark, even I have yet to make a penny from it while they have made millions.

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